Republicus

"Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me. I lift my lamp beside the golden door." The Statue of Liberty (P.S. Please be so kind as to enter through the proper channels and in an orderly fashion)

Name:
Location: Arlington, Virginia, United States

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

The Stove Got Hot...

...so the president and First Lady bolted out of the kitchen and played hooky yesterday.

...at an elementary school (ironically enough).

Who can blame him?

Day One of his presidency began with an unceremonious do-over of his flubbed swearing in with Chief Justice Roberts (just to "play it safe," but this time without the Bible, and so bedevilling the prophylactic replay).

Then the "emergency stimulus bill" that was presented to "create jobs and fix the economy" was discerned to do no such thing. The Democratic Congress that bewailed the Bush deficits as reaching "as far as the eye can see" suddenly began to grunt and snort that the sky's the limit, and oink-oinked like pigs in a poke with the prospect of nearly a trillion dollars worth of slop dump trucked into their pens.

"Yes, oh, YES!" they salivated and drooled, "Yes We Can!"

Rush Limbaugh made a double-take and gaped, his cigar drooping, then it erected again as he collected himself and smacked the napes of the crestfallen Republicans, barking at them to get sane and kosher. They snapped out of the magic spell that The One had cast over the land, dropped the rubber stamps, and pulled out the butcher knives.

And they stood as one--with 11 semi-sane Democrats to boot--and, white-knuckling the butcher knives, said: "No, Mr. President, We Really Can't."

Ah-oh.

So the President, in his first two weeks, is learning that working with Congress to bake a giant cake of an enormous economic stimulus package is a lot less community organizing, hoop skills, and speeches and much more like this:



(Good thing that wasn't Buckwheat, otherwise, it'd be racist.)

Meanwhile, as he tried to set up shop, with his vice president's announcement that "paying taxes is the patriotic thing to do" still echoing in the ears of a confused electorate:



...the president installs an (ergo) unpatriotic tax-evader at the Treasury Department, "Because he knows what he's doing."

Wait...What?

But then he loses his Health & Human Services Secretary appointee--former Senator Tom Daschle-- because he, too, unpatriotically didn't pay his taxes.

Wait...but what about...Huh?

The president apologized for the "mistake" and acknowledged that he was sending out mixed messages by appointing tax-evaders (which means taxes are going to go up).

However, his appointee for Attorney General gets through, despite the stigma of having given exiting President Clinton the go ahead to pardon the greatest tax-evading fugitive in American History--and so the very, very unpatriotic-- Marc Rich.

Alright. What gives?

Every Democrat stridently spoke out against the Bush tax cuts. First, because he cut taxes at all, and then that he cut them too much, and only for "the rich" (supposedly). However, the richest among them (one of them even garishly naming himself Rich--formerly Reich, interestingly enough) still cheat.

That can only mean either that:

(1) They really, personally, didn't think that Bush cut taxes enough (for themselves, the rich) and saw fit to give themselves an additional tax-cut, and so engaging in inverted projection when complaining that he cut them, then cut them too much.

(The inverted projection is the whopping 180 degree lie that puts as much distance from what they say and the truth as possible, putting them on polar opposites of it.)

-or-

(2) They really do believe that Bush cut taxes too much but consider themselves exempt.

The latter is the likely case (they don't call them "elitists" for nothing), but the former cannot be ruled out because such spoken, projected inversions of reality are often heard from the mouths of those inflicted with the mental illness of liberalism (it's from looking at their inverted reflections in the mirror too much).

It's true. And more and more people have figured that out, so the liberal president must continue to act conservative if he hopes to win a second term, the prospects of which have already been diminished in these the first two disastrous weeks, primarily because--in the midst of an economic crisis--his promoted "economic stimulus package" has the giant, flaming-pink word of LIBERAL written all over it.

He also considered it a first order of business to spite the choice of Pro-Life tax-payers not to contribute one red cent to abortion (in foreign countries, no less than here) by overturning the Mexico City Policy and so allowing federal revenues to make their way into abortion clinics abroad, and quickly abandoned his empty campaign rhetoric (in the first week of his presidency) and the assurrances that he believed that the word "marriage" was the exclusive domain of heterosexual husband and wife by calling for the repeal of the federal Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), which had ensured just that (and so having lied to Pastor Rick Warren's face at the Saddleback forum on his beliefs).

The Hopenchanger, after accusing Billary as part of the problem of American politics (which is true), calling them out on their self-serving, manipulative ways, dirty tricks, and even racist insinuations (true, true, and true), and finally defeating the Clinton Machine, has now stocked his cabinet with Clintonites and just had his arch-rival Billary sworn in to head the State Department (it's true).

And there were little things, too, which nevertheless contributed to putting the kibosh on the euphoria that anticipated a utopia bereft of all the things Bush was ridiculed and/or seethingly despised for, like his misspeaks and occasional buffoonery that were purportedly the proofs that the former governor of Texas had no business being a POTUS, like this supposedly disgraceful display of cluelessness from a jetlagged man in a foreign country (China) who was nevertheless clued in by door handles:



The mishap was reported and replayed widely to much ridiculing glee.

The media silence when the new president cluelessly mistook a window for a door into the White House, however, was deafening:



But there it was.

And the new president must be judged by the same standards.

During the swearing in of Hillary, with Bill and Chelsea looking on, Vice-President Biden briefly bobbled a few words of the oath he was delivering:



It was a cute, giggly moment for all involved, of course, for the vice president, too, who reportedly had a severe stuttering problem as a child, and so it was excusable and really not worth mentioning--except for the fact that the vice president earlier saw fit to mock Chief Justice Robert's own bobbling of a few words during the swearing in ceremony of the president (a mockery which the president, to his credit, did not seem to find amusing).



BTW, there are now only three people--Vice President Joe Biden, Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi, and President pro tempore of the Senate Robert Byrd--standing between Billary and Obama's job, a line of presidential succession that now looks something like this:








Aware that his immediate, leftward lurches would have the effect of throwing cold water on the faces of the many conservatives and moderates who he had succefully hypnotized into voting for him, the president did do the right thing and appointed a conservative Republican-- Senator Judd Gregg of New Hampshire--to fill the vacancy at Commerce.

With that, the hard left lunatic wing of his support--MSNBC, Daily Kos, Truthout, Moveon, Impaled-Ass, Fathead, Karl, Simian, Lana Banana, Blossom, Karin, etc.-- had cold water thrown in their faces, instead, but figured that their Machiavellian Master of Subterfuge and Ravager of Republicans--i.e. President Obama--must have brilliantly had a Super Majority Senate in mind, which the vacating of Gregg's seat could have allowed if filled by a Democrat.

But NO! Gregg insisted that he would take the post at Commerce only if his senate seat was filled by a fellow Republican, which was agreed to and so filled by J. Bonnie Newman, who appears to be a RINO (she describes herself as a "reasonable Republican," which means that regular Republicans are unreasonable?), but a Republican nevertheless.

And then there was--well, still is-- Club GITMO.

The president was sure to honor his campaign pledge that he would "immediately shut it down," but patience was called for. It's, ah, complicated. (Duh.)

But you can consider it immediately closed within a year.

Or so.

'k? :)

mm-K.

Don't worry. In the meantime, we won't be sending anyone else down there. We'll just send them somewhere else.

You know.

Renditions.

That's right. "Un-Constitutional," "Criminal," and "Impeachable" renditions.

How does that sound, now?

Insane, maybe?

Anyway, so it's turning out that the only "Hope" that Obama could deliver for the moonbatty loons was the hope for George W. Bush to leave the White House (although they had hoped he would leave via Impeachment or assassination), and the only "Change" being that Bush is, in fact, no longer in the White House.

The rest is pretty much same-ol,' same-ol,' only even worse than before, because, before, we had a president who pretty much knew what he was doing most of the time, while this guy is just winging it bathed in the glow of approvals that haven't been this high for a two-week old president since Jimmy Carter.

But there's something going on with his approvals. I can't quite put my finger on it, but you know the American electorate. They may not have the highest standards for their political leaders, but they do have high expectations, especially for one known as The One who promised a whole bunch of stuff that, unfortunately, exist only in Lollipop Land.

Meanwhile, in these the first two weeks of the Hope & Change Administration, Nature had her same old way way in the Midwest and other environs (as she had in the Southeast with New Orleans in 2005). An arctic blast knocked out power for thousands, and many died at just about the same time the insane Al Gore was sounding off apocalyptically to the Congress (for more laws and money) about Global Warming Doomsday unless we stopped burning fossil fuels.

And at just about the same time as that, the President, in firm agreement with Oracle Al, experienced his first snow day as President and torched up the fossil fuels in the White House because, it was explained, "he was from Hawaii."

Incidentally, he did a whole lot less for the freezing Midwesterners than "Heckuva job, Brownie" did for the waterlogged denizens of New Orleans.

Maybe because they were mostly white and vote Republican?

Well, anyway, so yes, it got pretty hot in there and the Obamas took off to an elementary school to get away from it all and hang out with The Children.

And if the next four years are anything like these first two weeks, the title of that book they're reading might just as well be "My Pet Goat."

26 Comments:

Blogger FJ said...

But then he loses his Commerce Secretary appointee--former Senator Tom Daschle--

I think Daschle was supposed to go to HHS, not Commerce... but who cares, now he's going nowhere!

And with Billary at State, who will be left to craft universal healthcare? Bill?

10:06 AM  
Blogger John said...

Wups. Thanks for pointing out the slip.

10:14 AM  
Blogger John said...

Anyway, yeah, fj, these first two weeks were an unmitigated debacle. The very, very worst first two weeks for any president ever in American history!

(Except for Lincoln, of course, when a chunk of the country seceded upon his inauguration--but I don't think that's the comparison Obama has in mind.)

10:56 AM  
Blogger Kelly said...

"And at just about the same time as that, the President, in firm agreement with Oracle Al, experienced his first snow day as President and torched up the fossil fuels in the White House because, it was explained, "he was from Hawaii.""

And he complained that those in DC were wimps for closing the schools...cause he was used to Chicago winters.

Soooooow, whichissit???

11:27 AM  
Anonymous Al Qaeda said...

"worst first two weeks for any president ever in American history!"

We agree. Thank you for supporting our point of view. Alla Akbar! God is Great!

11:27 AM  
Blogger Kelly said...

and lets not forget Pelosi's math..

11:35 AM  
Anonymous Joseph Smith said...

Full disclosure... This is what Kelly believes!
http://www.i4m.com/think/southpark.htm

11:44 AM  
Blogger Kelly said...

and you think Southpark has it right?

btw...I don't think that has anything to do with the subject of this blog post.

12:06 PM  
Anonymous Karin said...

Lol...well, that's the Fox "news"/Limbaugh version of history.

Now, I'm off to the real world...

1:18 PM  
Anonymous Joseph Smith said...

It shows how f'd up your way of thinking is. These are the people telling your cousin not to get married. Of course leading the charge was Captain Moron right!

Too bad you didn't bother to see how EVERYTHING cited in the SP episode is backed up by your mythology.

2:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Typical Conservative response. Don't bother me with the truth, I'll just believe whatever is convenient!

As to the think about "Whichissit..." Weren't you the moron bragging about how you could detect nuance?

2:07 PM  
Blogger John said...

So, "al qaeda," are you saying that I'm either with the administration policies, or I'm with you, the terrorists?

Yes.

3:11 PM  
Blogger Kelly said...

Well the Liberal response to the truth is to twist it.

3:37 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Twist what moron, that is stuff right from the book of moron.

3:42 PM  
Blogger Kelly said...

Anon can't keep with the subject of the post because he can't argue against it.

3:59 PM  
Blogger Kelly said...

and how would you know what was in that book...you ever read it?

3:59 PM  
Blogger FJ said...

The last thing he ever read was the communist manismessedup. Now he knows everything, just ask him.

4:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cover to cover. But keep dodging. Maybe FJ or John will save your ignorant butt. All you ever do is come in here and say "Yeah!" or "Go get 'em!". You can't even defend your cousin or beliefs. Its no surprise moron's like you got creamed in the last 2 elections.

4:20 PM  
Blogger John said...

We'll see about that. Romney in '12.

4:23 PM  
Anonymous micker said...

I took a trip through southern Idaho, parts of Utah and upper Nevada a few years ago. Miiiiiiiigod...you couldn't believe the freak show though that area...inbred mormons...and some of them must have descended from their granddaddy's mules.

All Republicans...and perfectly qualified for it.

4:25 PM  
Anonymous kelly said...

Help me John! The mean old liberal's are exposing my stupidity again!

4:28 PM  
Anonymous here, let me get that for you said...

Don't worry Kelly. The mean old liberal's only exposing his own ugly prejudice for soap droppers in San Francisco steam rooms.

4:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You mean soap droppers like Kelly's cousin?

5:32 AM  
Anonymous next time wear a towel said...

Exactly. Love the soap dropper... but call clumsy what it is.

3:14 PM  
Blogger John said...

Ignore them, Kelly. They're venting on Mormons because they're afraid to blame the African-American community in CA for the defeat of Prop 8 (which is too funny, since they counted on them to--*en masse*-- catapult Obama over the top), want a four year head start to trash Romney, and really hate Glen beck right now because he has their number and is spilling the beans.

6:01 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wasn;t Kelly the one bragging about how Captain Moron helped lead the charge to defeat Prop H8?

1:04 PM  

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